I drove...well...I was on the bus that someone was driving when I noticed a sign outside a school playground that said "Green Food Zone". Now I can only imagine that what was meant to be said was that they recycle and compost their food, but if not, that school's cafeteria is where I am going to be on St. Patrick's Day for sure. Even if I'm the creepy older person there trying to get at all the kids greasy green cafeteria food in their loudly marked Green Food Zone.
On the off chance, what was meant by that was that they compost, you may want to know that composting is a really big thing over here right now. Coffee shops leave their used grinds outside their store for other people to use and in that way 'recycle'. Hey, free once used coffee grinds? I'm there!
I went to the grocery store the other day and wanted to buy bananas for my cereal. So I went to the huge bunches of bananas in the produce section of the market, and broke me off three bananas. No one ever buys a huge bunch of bananas. For obvious reasons: A. they go bad quickly and B. they make your bread taste like old banana if your not careful and C. you usually only get around to eating one banana of the three you bought and then you wait so long to eat the others that they turn black and then you wait even longer past that to throw them away because you think that you may still may be able use them by making banana bread, but deep down you know thats really just a lie and your bananas have been doomed since day one, but sometimes you really want a banana so you buy them anyway thinking you will beat the viscous banana death cycle. So I went to buy my three, huge by the way, bananas, broke off three from the bunch - And suddenly people started to freak out. Oh no no no! Ahhhh what is she doing? She can't do that! (Again, I don't speak any Korean so I can only imagine that this is what they were saying)
What?
I ignored the outburst because I just wanted three bananas and went to pay at the register. At which point a produce lady followed me with the rejected bananas of the bunch. I put my items down in front of the cashier and separated three bananas. Held up my fingers and said "Three". I got the whole bunch pushed towards me. "No. I - only - want- THREE - bananas." Then they started laughing, a lot, and rubbed their bellies which I came to interpret as "Oh you better get hungry for bananas because your buying the whole bunch today" sort of belly rub.
So-
I bought (wasn't forced or anything) the whole bunch of bananas.
They are turning brown.
I would make banana bread if i had an oven.
I'll make sure I put them on the street tomorrow and 'recycle' them.
Next time you hit up that supermarket you should roam the aisles just randomly taking bites out of things. Then when they bum rush you at the check out with your half finished items you tell them "Oh I simply couldn't, I'm stuffed" It would be awesome if you maybe say it in Korean. And what's up with you treating bananas as though they are some bastard foodstuffs of the fruit world? More bananas=more fun!!!Happy happy fun time! Good for You! You like bananas, they like you!
ReplyDeleteYou should have broken off one banana at a time and thrown them individually at each and every person who was laughing and rubbing their belly and shoving bananas in your face. Then you should have taken your three and ran. You might have to find a new grocery market after that, but at least you stood your ground. I miss you! Tomorrow (Tuesday) is my birthday, and I want to talk to you! I'll have my skype open, try to go on your Tuesday or Wednesday morning.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth? Uhm, hi. It's your father writing and we're rather concerned over here about your silence, y'know. Ya see, we're not sure if the people in the grocery store were rubbing their stomachs as if to say "we're eating YOU, because you have insulted our banana cultural habits," sort of thing. And now that you're quiet an' all, well we're wondering if they haven't eaten you...but I'm sure that they haven't because if they had, you know, really eaten you, well the American Embassy would have told us by now. They do that kind of thing over their. I mean they tell American parents that their kids have been eaten by hungry green banana eating Koreans. So your silence has been a concern of ours for several days now and we just want to know that everything is o.k. and all that. It is Honey, isn't it? I mean it's alright to tell me if you've met some nice Korean boy because , well, you know,you've been so quiet for so long...and he's probably got a great sense of humor, doesn't he? Did you meet him at church,honey? Remember when you would go to church in your frilly pink dress and that darling little basket full of whatever that was? So Honey, be sure to write us because you've been too quiet for too long and your stories about the banana people are just SO funny! I tell all the neighbors and ...well, you know how neighbors can be when we start talking about bananas... and , oh dear, would you look at the time!...
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